Most little girls dream of womanhood in fairy tale splendor where she is running through a field of red poppies wearing a beautiful, flowing dress fit for a princess. Making her way to her dashing, Prince Charming, he takes her in his arms, lifts her from her feet and spins her through the air as her hair is caught in the breeze; highlights glistening in the sun.
Miraculously, she somehow survives the jar of high school into the jolt of adulthood with her fairy tale illusion somewhat in tack. The only difference is that the princess now realizes it is up to her to turn the beast into a prince and spends most of her time unhappy or defeated by the task. Resigning herself to harsh reality, she gives up on the prince and on the possibility of ever finding true love. Her fairy tale now resembles a creation from the Brother's Grimm.
Through my twenty-one plus years of marriage, countless conversations, mentoring, ministry and flat out crying and praying alongside other women, I have identified that nine-times-out-of-ten it is not the Prince that keeps us from finding true love, but us that keeps us from finding true love. Allow me to elaborate...
I was one of those little girls who wanted nothing more than to grow up, get married and have babies. I got exactly what I wanted, but the outcome--not so much. Life was far from a fairy tale and after years of demanding that my prince change (to no avail, I might add) I decided I deserved better. What I discovered, however, after years of misery in the search for better, is that I had been looking in the wrong place. My quest for true love and my hope for happiness had been laid in the lap of two incompetent people: Myself and my prince.
So here's two truths for all you Princesses out there:
1.) Jesus is the perfect Husband (Father, Friend and Companion). He not only is True Love, but Perfect Love. He loves through sin, shame, flaw, fat, failures, wrinkles and disappointment. Regardless of how insufficient you or your earthly prince may be, when the love and power of Christ is manifested in your life you will have a joy and peace that surpasses ALL understanding and you will be one of those women that other women come to and ask, "How do you do it?" You can then exhale, smile and boast, "It is the Lord!"
2.)No man on earth will ever be able to fill the void that only Christ can fill and if you continue to expect a fallible human being to meet all of your needs, you will drive yourself and the human in question to the breaking point.
So, where do we go from here?
Well, God knows your heart, circumstance and home life. He also knows you may not have it in you to lean on him in the manner that you need to be leaning. Here are a few practical steps:
1.) Ask Him for the desire and willingness to know him and love him more.
2.) Declare before heaven and earth, "I receive your perfect love, Lord! I desperately need to be loved by you and to feel and see your love in my life right now."
3.) Ask for forgiveness for where you have missed the mark as a Princess of the Most High and ask the Lord to change your heart and make you into the woman he created you to be. Petition Him for renewed strength and perspective regarding your current state/circumstances.
4.) Pray for your prince or the prince yet to come. Pray that they would love the Lord, desire to be obedient to him and that His will would be carried out in their lives.
Being groomed into a proper Princess is a work in progress. It takes time, lots of prayer and devotion, but after all these years I can most assuredly say to you that it is not only worth it, but a bit of heaven on earth!
In closing, my dears, True Love is out there and joyfully ever after certainly exists. So get your ball gowns on and race across the field of poppies to meet the original Prince Charming. Allow Him the right to make your dreams come true and experience relationships here on earth like never before!
Julie Peyton
Founder, Fit for the King Ministries International
Scripture References: Isaiah 54:5; 1 John 4:18; Philippians 4:7; James 2:22-24; Colossians 3:14; 1 Corinthians 13
(Julie Peyton and Fit for the King Ministries International advocate the rights and freedom of oppressed and abused women and in no way endorse harmful or cruel treatment towards them under any circumstance. If you or a woman you know is being abused, please seek professional or legal help immediately.)
Miraculously, she somehow survives the jar of high school into the jolt of adulthood with her fairy tale illusion somewhat in tack. The only difference is that the princess now realizes it is up to her to turn the beast into a prince and spends most of her time unhappy or defeated by the task. Resigning herself to harsh reality, she gives up on the prince and on the possibility of ever finding true love. Her fairy tale now resembles a creation from the Brother's Grimm.
Through my twenty-one plus years of marriage, countless conversations, mentoring, ministry and flat out crying and praying alongside other women, I have identified that nine-times-out-of-ten it is not the Prince that keeps us from finding true love, but us that keeps us from finding true love. Allow me to elaborate...
I was one of those little girls who wanted nothing more than to grow up, get married and have babies. I got exactly what I wanted, but the outcome--not so much. Life was far from a fairy tale and after years of demanding that my prince change (to no avail, I might add) I decided I deserved better. What I discovered, however, after years of misery in the search for better, is that I had been looking in the wrong place. My quest for true love and my hope for happiness had been laid in the lap of two incompetent people: Myself and my prince.
So here's two truths for all you Princesses out there:
1.) Jesus is the perfect Husband (Father, Friend and Companion). He not only is True Love, but Perfect Love. He loves through sin, shame, flaw, fat, failures, wrinkles and disappointment. Regardless of how insufficient you or your earthly prince may be, when the love and power of Christ is manifested in your life you will have a joy and peace that surpasses ALL understanding and you will be one of those women that other women come to and ask, "How do you do it?" You can then exhale, smile and boast, "It is the Lord!"
2.)No man on earth will ever be able to fill the void that only Christ can fill and if you continue to expect a fallible human being to meet all of your needs, you will drive yourself and the human in question to the breaking point.
So, where do we go from here?
Well, God knows your heart, circumstance and home life. He also knows you may not have it in you to lean on him in the manner that you need to be leaning. Here are a few practical steps:
1.) Ask Him for the desire and willingness to know him and love him more.
2.) Declare before heaven and earth, "I receive your perfect love, Lord! I desperately need to be loved by you and to feel and see your love in my life right now."
3.) Ask for forgiveness for where you have missed the mark as a Princess of the Most High and ask the Lord to change your heart and make you into the woman he created you to be. Petition Him for renewed strength and perspective regarding your current state/circumstances.
4.) Pray for your prince or the prince yet to come. Pray that they would love the Lord, desire to be obedient to him and that His will would be carried out in their lives.
Being groomed into a proper Princess is a work in progress. It takes time, lots of prayer and devotion, but after all these years I can most assuredly say to you that it is not only worth it, but a bit of heaven on earth!
In closing, my dears, True Love is out there and joyfully ever after certainly exists. So get your ball gowns on and race across the field of poppies to meet the original Prince Charming. Allow Him the right to make your dreams come true and experience relationships here on earth like never before!
Julie Peyton
Founder, Fit for the King Ministries International
Scripture References: Isaiah 54:5; 1 John 4:18; Philippians 4:7; James 2:22-24; Colossians 3:14; 1 Corinthians 13
(Julie Peyton and Fit for the King Ministries International advocate the rights and freedom of oppressed and abused women and in no way endorse harmful or cruel treatment towards them under any circumstance. If you or a woman you know is being abused, please seek professional or legal help immediately.)
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